CN: Mental health, medication, fictional portrayals of mental health and suicide. You know when you were little, did you ever stick your arms out and pretend to be a superhero? I still do it, sometimes. When it’s quiet, and my headphones are playing my song, I screw up my fists and turn my face to the wind. With arms outstretched I am the picture of a Primark home department wall hanging, the night air compelling me to dance like nobody is watching. It’s a scary thing, to feel your personality drain out of you. A few weeks ago I visited a new, more local, doctor because the low mood and anxiety I’d been feeling since the summer was showing no signs of shifting. “You’re not sleeping,” he said, like it wasn’t a question, before checking my file and seeing just how long I had been on my anti-depressant of choice. It was time, in his view, for me to try something new. I’ve spent most of the years since my late teens on some kind of anti-depressant or other. I started on fluoxetine – Prozac – which was great, since it was the late 90s and I worshipped the ground […]
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